So I guess my journey is beginning a little sooner than I had planned to blog about dating experiences. Last night was, I guess you could say, my first "real" "adult" first date. I spent the days before worrying it would be absolutely horrifying. Alas, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be...but it also wasn't great either. So this post I will be sharing some things for guys to consider during a first date..well actually just during a first date with me (and assuming for most women too). For his sake, I will not say which of these he did or did not do..so use your imagination :)
1. Guys should ALWAYS offer to pay. If you see me reaching for my wallet the words "oh please don't be silly" should be coming out of your mouth. And then, I'll smile and ask "are you sure?" and you should insist. If you are a stubborn chick and you really do want to contribute, go halfsies I suppose, but NEVER pay the whole thing. He asked YOU out - keep that in mind.
2. There shouldn't be an extended period of silence. If you just met each other, you should be asking tons and tons of questions to get to know them better. Small lulls are fine...longer ones get awkward. Guys especially should make an effort to ask questions because if you don't I'm assuming you don't care enough to learn more about me.
3. The phrase "I should really stop smoking weed" should never come out of your mouth...nor should you hit the bong before you go out on the date (this goes for both guys and girls). Also, if you're going out for a drink - neither party should get wasted. That looks realllyy bad.
4. Learn to read body language. If I like you, I will find a way to be closer to you and maybe even touch your arm (or leg if you're really lucky). Don't put your arm around me if I have made no such effort.
5. Finally, don't assume there's gunna be a second date. And if you want a second date, don't ask for it to be 2 days later. Even if I had a great time, I'm going to want to take some time and reflect to make sure I even want to see you again. Be a nice guy - call and ask (or facebook chat me, whatever).
This list could go on for days but I'll stop at 5.
Please, my lovely readers, I'd love your feedback on this. Do you agree with my thoughts? What did I leave out? Comments are very much so encouraged!
Shari... I don't know how to say this but you are the man! Lol I actually enjoy learning a little about the life of Shari
ReplyDeleteI guess technology etiquette would be something worth talking about. Don't check your phone a million times. If you need to check the time because you are parked at a meter or soemthing, make sure you wear a watch, please dont check your phone, your incoming bbms, texts, emails, etc. And if you keep saying sorry and you keep doing it then youre not really that sorry are you?
ReplyDeleteDon't facebook chat, IM me, or use any other social media. If I am going to be ignored, please use one medium rather than have me check 10 different types of social media frantically for no good reason.
Call me. No really, don't just contact me, but call me. I know now in the technology-driven age calling is the last thing you want to do. My boyfriend didn't have text messaging so we HAD to call each other when we started dating (and no this wasn't 10 years ago, this was 2 years ago). Even though I gave him hell about it, it really did make our relationship stronger because we talked a lot more than any other relationship I ever had (or all of them combined).
Good points, Betty. I made sure I didn't check my phone too often (I think twice and they were in the car ride home). But I would def. get annoyed if someone spent more time answering BBMs then trying to talk to me.
ReplyDeleteAnd Scott, glad you enjoyed!
Great post Shari! If i'm on a date i make sure to... 1) never check/reach for my phone (unless I get two or three calls in a row, then something might be up), 2) ask muchas preguntas (I enjoy getting to know them, plus who doesn't love talking about themselves!), 3) definitely pay for the meal (a couple of times we've gotten dessert or ice cream afterwards at a different place, so if she offers to pay then i think that's OK), and 4) not harass them via text or FB afterwards (#creeperstatus)
ReplyDeleteTyler - I feel like you wouldn't do any of the things above because you're not an asshole lol. But yes I agree I think letting her pay for a dessert after if she offers is acceptable (especially if you treated to a movie and/or dinner beforehand).
ReplyDelete